London Daily

Focus on the big picture.
Monday, Sep 21, 2026

A Woman Who Texted Her Boyfriend To Kill Himself Before His Suicide Has Pleaded Guilty To Manslaughter

A Woman Who Texted Her Boyfriend To Kill Himself Before His Suicide Has Pleaded Guilty To Manslaughter

In a plea agreement, Inyoung You accepted responsibility that her abusive text messages played a role in Alexander Urtula's suicide, authorities said.

A 23-year-old woman pleaded guilty to manslaughter on Thursday after repeatedly telling her boyfriend to kill himself, which he went on to do, while they were students at Boston College.

Inyoung You's guilty plea showed she accepted responsibility that her verbal, physical, and psychological abuse contributed to the suicide of Alexander Urtula, the Suffolk County district attorney's office said. You had originally pleaded not guilty in 2019; under the new plea agreement, she received a suspended sentence. If she violates any of her probation terms over the next 10 years, she could serve two and a half years in jail.

Among the terms of the agreement are that she will undergo mental health treatment and do community service. In addition, she may not profit from any portrayal of the case over the next 10 years.

“This agreement with defense counsel was made in close consultation with the Urtula family. It is consistent with their desire to seek accountability and closure and to protect the legacy of Alexander, a loving son, brother, and uncle," Suffolk County District Attorney Rachael Rollins said in a statement. "They believe this is something Alexander would have wanted."

You's lawyer did not immediately return BuzzFeed News' request for comment.

The two began dating in late 2017 or early 2018, BuzzFeed News previously reported. Prosecutors alleged that You became abusive toward Urtula in late summer 2018 after she found out he lied about meeting with his ex-girlfriend.

Prosecutors argued that You failed to stop her boyfriend even though she knew where he was and what he was going to do. They argued this made her “criminally responsible” for his suicide.

Throughout You and Urtula's 18-month relationship, You sent many abusive texts to Urtula, often telling him to die by suicide.

"do everyone a favor and go fucking kill yourself, you’re such a fucking stupid ass worthless shit," You texted 22-year-old Urtula, BuzzFeed News reported in 2019.

Alexander Urtula and Inyoung You


Urtula died on May 20, 2019, just hours before his college graduation. You was tracking his phone that morning and was present at the time of his death. Urtula's family was in town for his graduation.

Four days before his death, You texted him, "FUCK YOU GO FUCKING KILL YOURSELF..."

Steven Kim, You’s attorney, said in a statement in November 2019 that prosecutors had branded “an emotionally fragile young woman a monster to the entire world, further traumatizing her.”

Before You's arraignment, the Boston Globe published texts between You and Urtula before his death.

“ALEX. WHAT SRE YOU [expletive] DOING. IF U [expletive] LOVE ME STOP. IF U EVER [expletive] LOVED ME STOP," You texted Urtula, according to the Boston Globe.

But You's abuse throughout their relationship had been "near constant," Rollins said on Thursday. It became more disturbing and more frequent in the days before his death, as documented in the text messages and other evidence.

Rollins added the case showed how serious domestic violence is, and that it can affect many types of victims and take many forms. She urged anyone experiencing intimate partner violence to reach out to law enforcement or community groups for help.

"We want you healthy and alive," she said. "Please come to us for help if you feel unsafe, scared, or desperate as a result of abuse, bullying, or threats of harm or violence.”

The US National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is 1-800-273-8255. The Trevor Project, which provides help and suicide prevention resources for LGBTQ youth, is 1-866-488-7386. You can also text TALK to 741741 for free, anonymous 24/7 crisis support in the US from the Crisis Text Line. Find other international suicide helplines at Befrienders Worldwide (befrienders.org).

Newsletter

Related Articles

0:00
0:00
Close
British Museum Faces Questions Over Peter Thiel’s Private Bayeux Tapestry Viewing
Earl Spencer Memoir Excerpts Renew Public Debate Over Diana’s Death
Liberal Democrats Gather in Brighton for Autumn Conference
Mothercare Shares Plunge as Middle East Store Closures Threaten Long-Term Solvency
Kent Police Treat Folkestone Hotel Fire as Suspicious
Caribbean Governments Advance Reparations Campaign Seeking Engagement With Britain
Scottish Labour Leader Backs Rosebank and Jackdaw North Sea Projects
FCA Urges Young Adults to Trace £1.5 Billion in Unclaimed Child Trust Funds
UK Competition Regulator Opens Inquiry Into McCormick-Unilever Foods Deal
Public Inquiry Into Tees, Esk and Wear Valleys Mental Health Failings Set to Begin
Nigel Farage Looks to US Immigration Enforcement Model for UK Border Policy
Chiltern Railways Moves Into Public Ownership
Security Review Raises Concerns Over Sensitive UK Police Data Stored on Microsoft Cloud
Burnham Government Warns of Difficult Autumn Budget as Fiscal Headroom Narrows
Bank of England Holds Rates at 3.75% as Inflation Rises to 3.1%
Ed Sheeran Tour Faces Backlash After Macklemore Is Removed Over Pro-Palestinian Remarks
Vandalism of Traffic Cameras Intensifies Across Parts of England
Nearly 300 Evacuated as Fire Hits Grand Burstin Hotel in Folkestone
King Charles Warns AI Executives About Risks From Uncontrolled Technology
Church of England Apologises for Role in Historical Forced Adoption Practices
UK Debate Over Online Speech Intensifies After Arrest Figures Draw Scrutiny
Oxfordshire Village Holds Symbolic Independence Vote Over Asylum Accommodation Plan
Nigel Farage and Richard Tice Sue National Crime Agency Over Alleged Banking Data Leaks
Apple Introduces Stricter Age Checks for UK Accounts
BBC Cash Reserves Fall 66% to £125 Million as Broadcaster Restructures
McLaren Announces £500 Million UK Investment and Plans 1,000 Jobs
Green Party Wins Historic Gorton and Denton By-Election as Labour Falls to Third
Burnham Government Prepares October Budget Under Growing Fiscal Pressure
UK Energy Suppliers Pull Fixed-Price Deals as Wholesale Markets Turn More Volatile
Bank of England Holds Rates at 3.75% as Middle East Energy Shock Raises Inflation Risks
Addison Lee Founder Loses £20 Million UK Tax Tribunal Case
BrewDog Creditors Face Losses on About £190 Million of Debt
Harrods Seeks to Recover Abuse Compensation Costs From Mohamed Al Fayed’s Estate
Ed Davey Targets Reform UK as Liberal Democrat Conference Opens
Great Britain Retail Sales Rise 0.5% in August
NHS England Approves Life-Extending Treatment for Incurable Breast Cancer
Proposals to Limit NHS ADHD Diagnoses Draw Criticism From Patient Groups
Resolution Foundation Warns of Housing Cost Crunch for Low-Income UK Families
BBC Cash Reserves Fall to Decade Low as Annual Deficit Reaches £121 Million
Millisecond Software Error Triggered Major UK Air Traffic Control Disruption
Twenty Women Underwent Unnecessary Mastectomies During NHS Cancer Care
Sensitive UK Police Data Found Vulnerable to Access by Foreign Actors
British Steel Faces Renewed Pressure for a Long-Term Financial Plan
MPs Urge Government to End Thames Water Restructuring Talks With U.S. Hedge Funds
Andy Burnham Warns of Difficult UK Budget Choices as Inflation Returns to 3.1%
England Tightens School Food Standards With Restrictions on Deep-Fried and High-Sugar Foods
Oxfordshire Village Votes Symbolically to Leave UK Over Proposed Asylum Centre
Michael Marra Elected Leader of Scottish Labour
BBC Cash Reserves Fall Sharply as Financial Pressures Mount
George Osborne Calls for UK to Rejoin EU Customs Union
×